This Republican candidate's campaign rap is the bracing tonic we all need right now

2022-09-24 03:39:26 By : Mr. yong Guo

There’s a lot happening in the world of politics these days. Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis is involving himself in human trafficking in order to make some sort of tortured point about asylum seekers who want to come here and contribute to our culture and economy. Republicans continue to whine about inflation and immigration, even though blocking immigration is one of the key policy errors keeping inflation artificially high. And Donald Trump is hosting straight-up QAnon rallies now, apparently.

But I’ll wager that nothing in the otherworldly conserv-o-sphere is as ill-advised, off-putting, or eye-gougingly godawful as what you’re about to see.

Warning: This video is NSFW—unless your workplace has a medical crash cart with defibrillator pads and an auxiliary water cooler stocked with ipecac.

From Utah state Senate District 12 GOP candidate Linda Paulson, the rap world’s answer to Henrietta and Merna: 

I was a lifelong Dem until I saw this video. pic.twitter.com/wyqEKKx1q6

Hey Utah District 12, listen up right here

There’s a new name on the ballot for the Senate this year

My name is Linda Paulson, Republican and awesome

Love God and family and the Constitution

I tried to get another conservative to run

Nobody could do it so I’m getting it done

I’m pro-religious freedom, pro-life, pro-police

The right to bear arms and the right to free speech

I want less government, control and regulation

Want to stop and expose all political corruption

Where’s integrity, morality, accountability?

Government programs should lead to self-sufficiency

as the fundamental unit of society

But in schools they’re pushing for new beliefs

And just to clarify this, ‘cause there’s some who can’t define us

As a female adult I know what a woman is

You know, for years I’d thought Republicanism was a morally and intellectually bankrupt ethos that increasingly depends on misogyny, racism, anti-intellectualism, nativism, xenophobia, and disingenuous fear-mongering for its survival, but now that I see it all laid out in rap form …

Of course, whatever you think of Paulson’s headlong entree into genre-butchering buffoonery, it’s nice to see Michael Scott is still getting directing gigs …

Enjoy the rest of your day—and the shattered remnants of your now-squalid lives. I know I will. 

Check out Aldous J. Pennyfarthing’s  four-volume Trump-trashing compendium, including the finale,   Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters  to Donald Trump, at  this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can  download the  epilogue to  Goodbye, Asshat  for the low, low price of FREE.